Five Western Bluebirds
at the local water hole
after the fog lifts.
There is a hidden pack of cigarettes
waiting
after the patches, gum
and incessant vaping,
the midnight bellyache
and rattly ambulance ride
to a chair in Emergency
visited by young, head-scratching
teams practicing medicine
by consensus
find nothing wrong
and send me home—
and the second ride
two days later
across the parking lot
from the Doctor’s office.
There is a hidden pack of cigarettes
waiting
after Sepsis
and the gut-wrenching antibiotics
and mind-bending pain
medications:
I build loops in my sleep
and shoot bighorn sheep
from my hospital bed.
There is a hidden pack of cigarettes
waiting
six months later
after the surgeon tells me
what I cannot eat
or drink—after we agree
to wait a little longer.
If ever there was a table set
on the John Muir Trail,
it was picked clean
between meals
by Steller Jays
impatiently waiting,
screeching, falling
from Tamaracks
in the midden around
a black circle of stones.
The trail is wide
through Rae Lakes
beneath Fin Dome—
slick leather soles
on the Serpent’s back—
my name is in the box
above the fractured chimney
where I held a tourist
pregnant from falling.
Saved two risking one.
I leave again without the work,
without the pack stock,
without the traffic on the trail
whenever I want
to cast clear water
to green submarines
cruising a hidden lake
that I suspect
the world has found
and picked clean.
for Tim Loverin
Posted in Photographs, Poems 2019
Tagged Fin Dome, John Muir Trail, Kings Canyon, photography, poetry, Rae Lakes, Sierra Nevada, Steller Jays
Busy finding myself
between unfinished jobs
I have forgotten,
words leap
to start a line
of another poem
I’ll never finish:
half-baked epiphanies,
humorous futilities
like litter left behind me
doesn’t get the job done,
but makes the work
a little more fun.
How I crave the feel
of an old soft rope
in my hand,
spoke-balance loop
like an open mouth
hungry for heels
in the branding pen.
Fifty years
I’ve marked calves
on this spot,
chicken-coop corrals:
bog in the gate
that Giz built:
hog wire stapled
over a 2 x 6 rectangle
I drug through the mud—
replaced and almost forgotten.
It’s hard to let go:
same horseback look
south down-canyon,
creek meandering a bowl
of fresh green feed,
safe and apart
from a hazy world
beyond the narrows—
the feel of my rope
among neighbors
roping calves around a fire—
reliving a dream
on a borrowed horse.
Posted in Photographs, Poems 2019
Tagged branding, Calves, Homer Cove, photography, poetry
Up early, awaiting
confirmation of the storm
slated to rain out plans
to brand calves
without complaining,
feeding hay
on slick roads
to thin cows
as grass grows
against the cold
Winter Solstice.
Nothing on the news
but red and blue politics,
mass shootings
and fog on 99,
ads for fast foods,
wonder drugs
and old age—
not one damn thing
I want. Nothing
I can change
but feed more hay
to hungry souls.
Posted in Photographs, Poems 2019
Tagged branding, Calves, cows, photography, poetry, politics, rain, weather
I lived in town for a moment,
a neighborhood around the Shrine—
Black on one side,
college kids, the other
in a subdivided,
old two-story
peeling paint
we called Big Pink.
Weekend mecca for loud
electric sounds, Janis
and the Revolution wailing—
the street would teem
with strobe-lit kids,
weed wafting sidewalk trees,
trying to ignore the War,
Kent State and the M-16
awaiting graduation.
Landmarks close,
I had no plans to map—
yet found myself asleep
retracing trails
to High Sierra meadows,
bell mare edging
a snowmelt lake,
pine smoke and
a leaky bucket sky at night.
Posted in Photographs, Poems 2019
Tagged 1970, Los Angeles, photography, poetry, USC, Vietnam War
There’s a dragon with matches that’s loose on the town
Takes a whole pail of water just to cool him down.
– Grateful Dead (“Fire on the Mountain”)
After rain,
willows aflame,
green on black:
photographs
of germinating
truth taking root
after fire—after
the smoke clears
and dust disappears
with seasons changing—
we begin again
with grass.
Nine out of twelve days rain—
ground first to turn green
where an errant spark
blackened hillsides
three months back.
If only most of man’s mistakes
could be as easily erased
by just adding water
to all the bad actors
and their political stage plays.
There are no dreams like this:
old man learning to go slow
without coming to a stop—
hand let run the smooth flesh
of a time and weather-worn
corral-board table top, sanded
and shellacked, splinters sealed
beneath to become functional.
Scars and crooked fingers trace
the deep grain without calloused
insulation, a new sensation saved
for thin skin that bruises easily.
There are no dreams like this
for whip and spur youth, wide loops
and inflated heroics—yahoo mugs
raised to the wild, to the heavens
howling late into black night
when once I was among them.